Then Suddenly Everything was Different
by luckyendings
Summary: Seven year old Anita goes to live with her mysterious godfather, Toby Turner, leaving behind Niceville, Florida and into a whole new life under the care of a man she never knew. A Tobuscus FanFic.
1. The Flight Attendant

I stared at my new, blue and white sneakers. Of all the most cliché things a story could contain, I was one of them. I didn't know that at the time, in my seven years of life I haven't read many books to judge certain aspects as cliché, let alone define the word. But I was an orphan: mother dead of some sort of cancer I still can't recall the name of today and father dead because he couldn't handle the loss anymore.

I know, right?

Couldn't you be a bit more creative, author?

Geez.

So there I was, being all predictable on the airplane to where I was to live with my godfather, inspecting my shoes because the movie playing on the tiny screen in front of me didn't seem as important.

I had never met my godfather. Apparently he and my dad were good friends in Niceville, Florida, where they grew up. Despite being five years older, my father deemed Mr. Godfather responsible enough to care for me in case of his passing. He later moved across the country to Los Angeles, while Dad raised me in Florida.

Florida was all I knew. We had a tangerine tree in the little backyard behind the one-story house. I used to spin in the swing hung from it, the tangerines squirting their sweet juice into my mouth as I ate one, and then another, and another, and another.

By the time I was two, my mother was gone and my father locked himself in his room. I learned to care for myself, eating peanut butter and jelly with some more tangerines everyday because it was the easiest thing to make. On bad days, I'll lie awake to hear Dad sobbing in the room beside my own.

He became a zombie. Every Sunday he and his blank face left and returned with groceries. Every Monday he shuffled around to do laundry. And every night his shadow would stop at my door. While I pretended to be asleep, he kissed my forehead and left without another word.

I acted like I was already dreaming because I didn't know what to say to him. His transformation had scared me and I didn't want to talk to my father. He used to write novels, work from home. But the most recent one was abandoned a quarter of the way in.

One night of my sixth year his shadow never passed. That morning I got up on my own, dressed myself, ate breakfast, brushed my teeth, and politely waited for him to drive me to school. The locked door to his bedroom never opened.

The school called later and asked why one of their kindergartners wasn't there. I picked up the phone delicately. Where is your dad? You don't know? Have you checked his room? We're sending someone to help you, honey, stay put.

They never told me exactly how he did it. I ended up in a foster home as strangers leafed through papers on possible relatives to take me. But I had no relatives.

Only a godfather on the other side of the country.

The flight attendant went up to my row.

"Anita, I will be taking you off board, OK, honey?"

I was getting sick of people calling me "hun" or "honey."

"Yeah, ok. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Will you be ready in ten minutes?"

I nodded; I had heard the announcement you made two seconds ago to everyone else, lady.

She smiled, ignorant to my thoughts. The next ten minutes consisted of me scooting over to the window seat I had rejected earlier. No other passengers sat with me, I had the whole row of seats to myself. I sipped a tiny swallow of orange juice out of the bottle that the lady had given me before.

Yuck.

I grimaced and set it down to gaze at the California landscape beneath me to pass the time.

The attendant rushed over to me when the plane ceased to move. She grabbed my backpack from the compartment above and took my hand without my consent. I wanted to pull away, she had babied me enough, but I went with it.

She stayed with me the whole way, more formal papers my seven-year old brain couldn't understand for my new guardian stuck under her arm. I allowed myself to sit on a black plastic seat, hugging my backpack to my chest.

I flinched when I felt someone tap my shoulder.

"Hey, you Anita?" A kind face was level to mine; he was kneeling behind the seat. I got suspicious; no adult gets down like that to talk to children.

"Yes she is!" the attendant blurted out before I could say anything, "Are you Toby Turner?"

"Yeah," he stood to converse with her, his hand rested on the back of my chair.

While they discussed the paperwork, I studied his hand: no ring. I may have only been seven but I knew a handsome man when I saw one, so I was surprised to discover the fact he wasn't married.

Removing my gaze from his hand, I continued to his face. Mousy brown hair that stuck out as far as its short length could reach. The ends curled around his odd pointy ears that settled next to wispy sideburns. Toby's hazel green eyes flickered around, distracted from the conversation with the attendant, about my adoption- about my future. And he was distracted.

Who is this man?


	2. Bunny

The ride to his house was an awkward one. Well, at least for Toby it was. I believed that the only reason he took me in was because he owed my father for leaving him alone to care for me. I mean, they must've been really good friends if he trusted him enough to sign papers to make him my godfather.

But the thing was that I didn't trust him.

"Anita?"

"M-hm?" I mumbled, staring out the window as the palm trees whizzed by.

"Um," Toby paused like he hadn't thought I would actually reply, "Well, I'm sorry about your dad. He was a really great guy."

"M-hm." I responded.

Another pause, "Yeah."

The rest of our time in his silver convertible was spent in silence except for the rush of the wheels and the slow hum of the engine.

When we reached his house he pulled into a cluttered garage. He rushed to get out of the car and sprinted over to my side. With a click, he opened my door and held out his hand.

It was obvious he wanted to help me out, but I just handed him my backpack and slid off the seat on my own. He hid his disappointment and just slung the strap over his shoulder. I stepped in front of him and we wandered over to the door.

He held me back with his hand on my back and jingled in his pockets for the key. His body surrounded me as he leaned over to stick the key into the hole and twist it open. The knob snapped open and Toby pushed the door inwards to let us in.

All the walls were white. But for some reason they were covered in paintings of… himself. Toby in armor, Toby singing, Toby portraits, and a dog. The dog was explained in an instant when a tan-spotted Shih Tzu skittered over, claws making scratching noises on the wood floor.

The dog leaped up, front paws thumping against my legs and feet. I brought my hands up to defend my face from his sloppy tongue.

"Aw! Who's my little bunny? Do you like your new sister?" Toby crooned. The rabbit dog's attention shifted to its owner and he danced around Toby's feet in the excitement that he probably didn't even understand.

In a single motion Toby picked up the Shih Tzu and kneeled down like he had at the airport to get down at my level.

"His name is Gryphon," he uttered as the dog licked his face and cocked his head at me.

"Hi, Bunny," I whispered and tentatively brought my hand up to pat Gryphon's head ever so slightly.

"You've already caught on," his face stretched with a huge grin because I've broken my vow to not talk.

I bit my bottom lip to keep from smiling _too_ much.

Toby left me to play with Gryphon on the rug of the living room. He strutted back and forth from the garage back to us two and made a point to try and stack every suitcase on top of each other.

The brown square design on the carpet hugged the black couch and coffee table where game controllers and wires tangled together. I giggled to myself as I watched the little dog rub his face on the rug with much enthusiasm, trying not to stare too much at the now leaning tower of luggage.

"Done!" Toby cried with pride after topping his masterpiece with the pair of new sneakers I had left at the door mat.

I gave a little squeak as the tower toppled over.


	3. Can't Sleep

The bed was too clean. I had this same problem before when I moved into the foster home. Toby had helped me settle in already once the scattered bags had been picked up, so the room contained familiar things, but the sheets smelled too soapy and felt too crisp. At least I didn't have to worry about getting up for school in the morning.

I twisted around to try and find a comfortable position on the squishy pillow, listening to the whizzing of the lazy air conditioner. Still not comfortable. I was so tired that I could feel my eyes drying, but even when I closed them my brain wouldn't take a break.

Giving in, I sat up. Peeling off the thin sheet, the cool air iced the bit of sweat that had accumulated on the back of my neck. My nightgown was a men's large white t-shirt that was once my dad's. The shirt was so large on me it went down to me knees when I stood up on the plush carpeted floor.

I crumpled a corner of the fabric into my fist and slowly walked out of the room. The door clicked too loud for my liking in the silence, but I continued anyways down the hall.

Toby had said before he was working, so I wasn't that surprised to find him in on the couch with the laptop on the table in front of him. However he wasn't paying attention to the screen. Instead his iPhone was up to his ear and he was leaning back into the couch cushions with his feet propped up next to the computer.

I was to the side of him, and he hadn't noticed me yet so I just stood there with the shirt twisting in my hands.

"Uh-huh, yeah... She's really sweet, but a bit uncomfortable right now… Yeah I can still go to Jack's shoot… Actually, yeah, that would help… You can come over tomorrow to meet her… Maybe a bit-" That was when he finally realized I was there. He had reached out to grab his drink and must've seen my presence from the corner of his eye.

"Oh, sorry Olga. But I've gotta go. I'll text you in a bit… Yeah I'm fine, just have to go, BYE!" He forced the last word with a push of the "End" button.

"What is it, Anita?"

"I can't sleep," I murmured.

"I get it, do you want to stay here a while?" He patted his hand onto the black couch in the space next to him.

I nodded and dawdled over. Toby shifted himself so he could work with the laptop perched on his thighs. Stealing a pillow from the end of the sofa, I laid my head on the black, red, and white stripes next to his legs and scrunched myself into a ball.

Questions poured in: Who was Olga? Why did she need to meet me? Who's Jack? What are they shooting? Is Toby leaving? How is Olga helping out? "Maybe a bit" what?

But they spilled over when Toby's hand reached down to stroke my short curly brown hair that sprawled across the pillow. I quieted the bursting thoughts and closed my eyes. The rhythm of his hand and the taps of the keys became my lullaby.

Slowly, my drowsiness crashed over and I dreamed.

I dreamed of a monster named Olga.


	4. Breakfast

I woke that morning in bed. He must have carried me in when he decided to hit the hay himself. Despite the disdain I had for this place last night, it felt much more welcoming with the morning sun shining through the window, making bright white squares on the blankets. The pillow I had taken from the couch was still settled under my head. Black, red and white, it was incredibly soft and smelled much more comfortable then the tangy soap from the other ones.

Licking my lips from the dryness, I reached to grab the pillow and snuggled it, curling my body and shifting my head to the bare mattress. My hair tickled my neck as I returned to previous unanswered questions.

I pondered over the coming Olga and tried to recall the dream I had of her. But it slowly left me like water dripping through cupped fingers. No matter how hard you try to hold on, it just slips away. All I could remember was that she hadn't liked me. She thought I was too small and accused me of hating Toby because I wouldn't talk to him. But I couldn't think of what I had responded with.

Taking deep breaths, I calmed myself. That couldn't be the real her. It was only a dream.

A small knock interrupted my thoughts.

"Anita?" I heard Toby whisper through the closed door.

"I'm awake," I scrambled a bit to sit up, still tightly clutching onto the pillow when he entered.

"Hey, little ant. Did you sleep better?"

I nodded. At least "ant" was better than "honey." Plus it made sense.

"That's good," he said as he sat on the bed, making it sink to hold his weight. "Today I'm gonna have a friend over. Her name is Olga. We'll meet her for breakfast and then we'll all come back here, okay?"

I nodded again. A friend. That was what he said.

Toby smiled at me, "Alright, how about you get dressed and we can go?"

"Okay."

When I was once again alone in the room, I pulled on comfy white shorts and a blue blouse. I used the large mirror that covered the closet door to brush my hair out of its bushy appearance. Tugging the knots out, I scrunched up my face into a grimace.

I returned my hand that clenched the brush to my side and stared at myself.

Anita Turner stared back. Female. Seven years old. Curly short dark brown hair that bounced off her shoulders. Navy blue eyes rimmed with shadows of little sleep. Freckles that scattered across her face like stars when the sky was clear. Anita Turner. Turner, Turner, Turner…

After repeating it so much the last name sounded less and less like a real word.

I set down my hairbrush on the top of the dresser next to a stack of books.

"Good luck, little ant," I told the reflection.

Emerging into the hall, I saw Toby pacing back and forth, doing something on his phone. Every once in a while he'd smirk at whatever he was reading and then swipe his thumb down the screen for more.

"I'm ready," I announced, not ready to spy on his dealings with a phone anymore.

"Alright! Let us go for breakfast!" He galloped his way to the door and I ran after him.

This car ride was a great improvement from the previous. He played some sort of song about chicken nuggets and mashed potatoes but the roof was open on the convertible so that was all I really heard. Toby just sang out loud so ridiculously I had to laugh. The wind was the best part. Summer mornings were hot in L.A. and the speed seemed to brush the heat rays aside.

Toby wore sunglasses and the same purple t-shirt he had been wearing yesterday. It had some sort of stone text on it that I couldn't read because I hadn't had a good look at it yet. Besides that he also wore grey khaki shorts and flip-flops.

He parked the silver car outside a Starbucks. I've never been inside one before. There were quite a few back in Niceville but my dad wasn't much of a coffee person.

I automatically grabbed Toby's hand when we had to cross across the parking lot to get to the front door. It was natural because, being a kid, I had been trained to always hold hands with the adult you cross any sort of automobile infested area.

"GO GO GO GO!" Toby sprinted across the desolate pavement, half dragging me along with him.

He didn't even slow down until we were inside the coffee shop, fans slowly twirling above us. By then he was pretending to be out of breath. Heaving in loud gasps between each word, he tried to congratulate me.

"You… are… fast," he wheezed. I just shook my head in mock disappointment.

We waited in a short line and ordered ourselves some breakfast. Toby got a medium iced coffee and me a lemonade. Both of us got apple fritters.

Sitting at a cute little table by the window, I bit into the pastry. The warm sweet apples squished into my mouth with the flaky crust. Yum. I looked up to see Toby watching me, his mouth full of food too. He just blinked a bit when we made eye contact, then made a muffled little laugh. I smiled in return, to show that I was enjoying my meal, only to realize I already was smiling. So I just stretched it a bit wider.

The thump of a car door closing perked him up and he strained to look out the window over me. He quickly swallowed his food and gave a tiny wave to the person outside. With his free hand he reached for his coffee as I twisted to see what I've been waiting for.


	5. Ant and Olga

She was a pretty little thing. Almost a head shorter than Toby, her dark auburn hair was pulled out of her face with a pair of pink sunglasses. She had on a purple flowery sundress that flowed just below her knees. Around her shoulder a little white bag was slung. When she saw Toby's wave, a big grin painted her face and she raised her own hand in return.

I didn't think she had noticed me yet so I didn't move to greet her. Turning away, I looked at the ground, eyes averted.

Her sandals slapped the tiles as she walked over to our table. Stealing a chair from an empty table, she dragged it over so she sat next to Toby and me. She plopped her purse on the ground beside it.

Before sitting she greeted me, "Hey, Anita!"

"Ant, this is Olga," Toby gestured toward her.

"Hello," I muttered.

"Olga, this is Ant."

"Ant?" she asked.

"Anita- Ant."

Olga laughed. It was higher pitched than her voice and sounded airy, like a lazy summer breeze. "I guess that works. Well then, Ant. You've already got a pet name from Toby. You should be happy." She had a Russian accent. Not to strong but strong enough that it was recognizable.

I nodded and kept a straight face. By now she had slid herself into the chair and pulled in close to the table. I took another huge bite into my apple fritter to keep from talking.

"Anita, Olga is going to hang out with you while I'm gone for work sometimes, is that okay?" Toby whispered, as if Olga couldn't hear. I glanced over at her and saw that she was looking at me intensely with gray-blue eyes, as if she really wanted to know what I would say.

I didn't know what to say. I didn't expect Toby to ask me. Did he really want to know my opinion on the matter? He had said Anita this time so it must've gotten serious. Good gravy, what do I tell him? The truth?

"I don't know, can she?

They laughed.

"Yeah, she can," Toby said, "But it depends on how you two get along. How about we wait a bit longer before you make your decision?"

I nodded again and Olga agreed with a little, "Alright."

He smiled, "See? You're all ready thinking alike!" And he sunk his teeth into the pastry.

We finished up at the coffee shop and drove home. Olga was going to Toby's in her own car, so it was just me and him again.

She had asked me all these questions, some of which I didn't have a good answer too: _Favorite song_? I like a lot of songs. _Favorite color?_ Green (but it'll probably blue tomorrow). _What do you like to do?_ Read… _Can you play any instruments?_ No.

I got more and more unsure of myself at each question until it was finally time to go. It wasn't her fault; she just made me realize that I didn't as much about myself as I thought, so I got uncomfortable and self-conscious.

On the way home I kept the lemonade bottle in between my knees, numbing the skin. Toby kept his hand on the cold plastic of his coffee cup in the holder that he used as an arm rest, his left hand tapping on the wheel to another unrecognizable song.

The beat was a nice one, though, so I secretly swung my feet against the bottom of the seat along with it. Eventually the chorus got to me and I slowly swayed my head side to side as well. I loved the sound of that violin in the back, singing perfectly with the twang of guitar.

Olga had reached Toby's house before us, I recognized her car in the drive way.

"She's already inside?" I questioned when I didn't see her.

"Yeah, she knows where the secret key is. You should know where that is too, but remember: It's a secret. Okay, Ant?"

"Okay." I hopped out of the car and scuttled over to the door where Toby showed me the key's hiding place.

Haha, you thought I was going to tell you? Remember: It's a secret.

He did the same thing as the other day, where he completely covered me with his body so he could lean over and open the door. I pulled my head down so it didn't jab Toby's chest.

"Olga?" He cried inside when he pushed through the door.

"And there's Toby!" We heard her exclaim from the other room.

"Stay here," he whispered into my ear and left my side in the door frame.

"Why are you vlogging in my HOUSE?" Toby screams at her.

Vlogging?

"AH! He beats me! HEBEATSMERUN!" I listen intently as they chase each other in circles, squealing. Olga was holding a little pink camera in her hand, pointing it at herself. When they flew through the living room, I ducked, feeling like I was intruding on something sacred.

She slipped on the carpet and tumbled onto the couch, throwing her head back with laughter as Toby fell on top of her.

He exaggerated heavy grunting and moans of pain.

I giggled from where I crouched and stared in wonder.

"Alright, I stopped it," she tried to say between laughs, bringing the camera to her side.

They were so engrossed on giggling together, settling into actual sitting positions on the soft couch that I thought they'd forgotten I was there. He brought his arm around her shoulders and sighed, calming his toothy grin into a small smile.

"Ant, can you c'mere?"

I shuffled over, sitting on the armrest with my feet resting in the space next to where Toby sat.

"I think I owe you an explanation of what it is I really do."


	6. An Incredible Job

He tried his best to explain everything to me at once. The first question he asked me was whether or not I knew what YouTube is.

"Yeah, I do." I hadn't used it much more than to listen to music though, because I didn't have a music player of my own back in Florida.

But apparently Toby had a job on this little website. He made comedic content and posted it there, where millions of fans would watch him everyday from his main channel, gaming channel, and vlog channel. It was what he did for a living, making people laugh all on his own with only a few editors and friends to help him out. What I didn't understand was how he made money simply from posting videos.

"Well, pretend you have a company that sells… apples," he said, stealing me a ripe apple from its home in the bowl, "You really want to get as many people as you want to know about your company so that more people will buy the apples. So you make a colorful advertisement and post it where billions of people go so you can get as many people as possible to see it. You have to pay the place you put it so you can hang it there. However, the money is not all going to the place you put it, but also to the people that make everyone want to go there… are you with me so far?" He was sitting on the couch again, hands flying everywhere as he talked.

I thought for a few seconds and then nodded, it made sense.

"Ok, so, technically, I'm one of the people who makes others want to come to YouTube, where you can tell people about your apples. So when you and other company owners come to pay to post there notices on YouTube, it helps me out."

"So, the more people that comes to see you, the more money you make?" I asked.

"Exactly!" he exclaimed and then draped over Olga's shoulders again, who had been smiling quietly the whole time.

"Are you going to ask her now, Toby?" she turned her head to him as she spoke.

"What?"

"It's just a little thing. But, do you want to _be_ in my videos? It means much more than you might think. People can be really rude online, and I won't let you go by your real name, just Ant, and it may mean some acting work for you if you want. Plus-"

"Yes. Yes, please. I really would like to," I interrupted him. I wanted to feel needed. He had already made me feel very included and wanted, but being needed was different.

"Are you really sure? I mean-" but he stopped when Olga quieted him with a squeeze of his arm. He turned his head to look at her and they made a silent agreement with their eyes. "Alright. Sorry, I guess I'm just a bit paranoid."

"She'll be fine. We will all make sure of it," Olga promised and Toby gave a little smile.

Then suddenly everything was different.

I became a part of Toby's incredible job.

His Lazy Vlogs were daily, and he later told me he had done the one on the first day I was at his house after he had put me back in my bed. Taking Gryphon out for a late night walk, Toby had paced up and down our street with his iPhone camera pointed at himself in the dim glow of the street lights. I later watched that video and found that he had hinted at "a new addition to the life of Tobuscus."

The first one I ever got into was done as soon as Olga left. He pulled out the phone, set it in the fridge and hit record. Waiting a few seconds, he then picked it up and began an introduction, "Audience? Wha- What are you doing inside the fridge? Are you hungry? I have, uh, some milk that I'm allergic to, so you can have that. I guess- INTRO OF DARKNESS THEN REDNESS THEN WHITENESS!" I watched in curiosity as he covered the lens with his fingertip and hollered out.

He laughed at himself and continued, "Okay are you ready? You ready?" He nudged the opening of the milk carton at the camera, "HAHA! What was I thinking? You can't drink through this, it's a video."

I laughed with my hand covering my mouth but the muffled sound still got through. Toby heard it and spun on the kitchen tiles to face me, holding out the iPhone to catch my face.

Squealing, I jumped and ran from the kitchen. It suddenly hit me that this is not just a camera but thousands of people watching me.

"Come back here, miss!" I heard him shout from behind me. I giggled loudly to tell him I was joking and not terrified.

He lumbered in, thumping his feet on the ground. "Where are you?" Toby roared; his hand still up to capture the moment. I tried to escape again when he found me but he lunged out with a grab, catching me around the waist and then tumbling onto a giant black beanbag on the floor.

I landed on top of him, his arm still around my stomach. Letting my head fall onto his chest, I laughed until I was out of breath.

"So guys, this is the new addition I was talking about. I've dubbed her Ant, and she is my official daughter of god-ness. She'll be living with me now, so you better get used to her adorable little face." He adjusted the angle so that I saw myself on the screen, grinning ridiculously. I acknowledged the Audience with a wave.

"Hm, so what else?" His attention wandered away on to other things like the possibility of playing new games on his gaming channel and a music video he was working on that he kept calling "awesome." Toby often interrupted himself by laughing at his own joke, throwing his head back a bit each time.

"Alright, I'm gonna go. Bless your face, if you sneezed during this video, bless you. , if you wanna win a t-shirt post a comment about little ant daughters and how to cope with their cuteness," he hugs me tighter and stretches out the camera so it gets both of us, "Peace off! Badadododododododo subscribe! OUTRO OF DARKNESS THEN REDNESS THEN WHITENESS… then- Ant say boop."

"Boop?"

And Toby stopped recording.


	7. New Life

***Long chapter because I didn't want to divide it into two, that's also why it took me a bit longer… Thanks for reading everyone!***

I couldn't sleep again that night. So I repeated my little adventure to the living room couch. Toby was once again on his laptop, annotating some video he had just uploaded. On the bridge of his nose a pair of half-rimmed glasses perched. I hadn't realized he was wearing contacts before, but I liked the glasses. It made him look more timid and intelligent.

He had in some Apple ear buds in so I tapped him cautiously on the shoulder. Toby simply looked over and nodded so I crawled into the same spot I was in the night before with the same pillow under my head.

Eventually he finished up annotating and reached down to rub my shoulder.

"Am I doing alright, Anita?" He asked me in a whisper, not looking down.

"What do you mean?" I was startled by the question.

"I mean, are you happy? Is there something I shouldn't be doing or should be doing?"

"I think you're doing an amazing job. I like it here, Toby, I really do."

He sighed in relief and leaned down to press his cheek against mine in a tight embrace, "Thanks."

He didn't return to his work on the computer, but instead just let the glow of the screen wash over us as he stroked my hair again.

"Toby?" I muttered tentatively, pushing up so that I leaned against my forearm.

"Mm-hm?"

"Can we watch some of your videos? I want to see them."

I learned a lot about his sense of humor that night. He laughed at his own jokes along with me and I couldn't have loved it anymore. We started with some of his new ones, going through Cute Win Fails. Then we watched literal trailers, and slowly the videos got older and older until they weren't even HD anymore. He skipped over a few in the end, one's he wasn't proud of anymore or had some language I couldn't take, and ended with one called, "Tag."

It was almost midnight when we finished, the latest I've ever stayed up. My eyes drooped half way through the epic rainbow chase scene, and the world slowly faded away.

Throughout the next two weeks I adapted to life with Toby. I still fell asleep each night on the couch and woke up each morning in my bed, but it became only routine to the both of us.

Toby spent a few days off to shoot a video with a friend named Jack, some other YouTuber that I hadn't had the privilege to meet yet. Meanwhile Olga babysat me. But neither of them called it that.

She liked to take me out shopping, and I discovered that her way of vlogging and how different it was from Toby's. Instead of short clips of his day, she vlogged as much as possible every minute and threw it all together for the next day. I ended up in there a lot. Olga liked to treat me with little things while Toby was working like a new shirt or pair of sandals. When he finally got to meet up with us again, we would go out for ice cream or buy a pack of M&M's.

With Gryphon on a leash, we would take the candy with us to the park and practice throwing each chocolate piece in the air and try and catch it in our open mouths. I quickly learned to master the technique while Toby liked to exaggerate his failures into completely falling over.

It was hot those summer days, hot enough that you could literally feel the sweat bead up on your forehead. Hot enough that sometimes when you open the fridge you stand there for a second to let the cold air wash over you. But they were good days. I became a proper daughter to Toby.

One particularly hot day Toby was home but the thermometer said it wasn't a good idea to go to the park. Instead he drove the two of us to the post office, where he left me in the car for a minute to return with a large box of envelopes balanced on top of a bigger cardboard package.

I twisted myself around to watch as he opened up the trunk to relieve his load onto even more mail.

"Is that your fan mail?" I asked him in astonishment.

"Yeah, I'm really bad at keeping up with it," he sighed as he closed the car door to come in. "It's too hot to do anything that requires moving so I thought we could go through some of it, usually it's a lot of fun." He smiled at me encouragingly.

"Okay!" I already had my eyes on that big package.

In the garage I realized that the reason I had thought it cluttered before was because of the large amount of boxes. Toby opened the trunk again and transferred the burden onto some shelves.

"Wait!" I cried, something catching my eye, "Can I see that?"

It was the package I wanted to open before. But there was something more than just the fact that it was large, I thought I had read my name. In fact I was quite positive that I had.

"Antbuscus?" I immediately connected it to Toby's main username, Tobuscus.

"It's addressed specifically to you. Why don't you take that one in? I'll get a stack of some envelopes."

"Okay," I said, still in wonder.

We settled in the living room. I patiently waited for Toby to return from the kitchen with the scissors while sitting on the beanbag. He settled on the black sofa and used one of the blades to slice through the packing tape.

"OHHHH!" He exclaimed, pulling out the contents. A giant mass of copper colored fluff emerged from the cardboard. It was a worn out teddy bear, almost as big as me. Its brown fur was matted around the face and its stuffing sagged in its legs and arms. But it was perfect.

I opened up my arms and Toby handed him to me, I squeezed the stuffed bear like I'd known him for a long time.

"There's a letter," Toby said and fished out a folded up piece of paper from the bottom of the box. It said in perfect handwritten letters, "To Ant."

He passed it over to me as well. I adjusted the bear so he hugged me around my waist as I leaned over him to open up the letter. I read it in the slow, tedious way a little girl does.

_Hey Ant! My name is Kristy. I live in Belmont, Massachusetts and I'm 17 years old. You are one lucky duck, getting to live with the amazing Toby Turner. But you probably have had to go through a lot to get there._

_I want to give you my best friend. His name is George and he's helped me through tough times of my own. You see, I'm very sick. I've been very sick for a long time. My body has to fight this nasty kind of cancer called leukemia. Isn't that a funky name? I've had it ever since I was eight, about your age as far as I can tell. It makes me feel gross and I often spend my time in the hospital._

_I've always wanted to send Toby something, to try to tell him what he's done for me. But I could never thing of anything worthy enough to give to him. My boyfriend showed me his videos once, and he's put a smile on my face ever since every time. Toby kept me from giving up and has become part of my daily medicine._

_I don't know you very well, Ant, but I can tell you're way too grown up for your age. You've been through too much when you still deserve to be a kid._

_Take good care of George. He's old but he's a great listener._

_And tell Toby I said hi._

_Love,_

_Kristy_

I suddenly had one of those moments where everything bad that's ever happened to me comes crashing down, striking me into sobbing. Halfway through the letter I felt my lip begin to quiver, so I bit it down. But the connections suddenly made between me and this girl hit me so hard I broke. It was messy. My tears poured out and I buried my face into George's fur to wipe the snot that was beginning to come out of my nose.

Toby had been looking through some other mail, but his smiles at the fanart vanished when he heard the choking noises I made. He crawled over and folded me into his arms. I still grasped the giant stuffed bear to my body as Toby cradled me, whispering softly.

"Shhh, it's okay. It's okay. Just let it out," he murmured into my hair, pressing his lips into the top of my head, "Oh, Ant, I'm sorry."

I heard him take a deep gulp, like he was fighting back tears too.

But I wasn't with Toby. I was deep into my past, where death and depression surrounded me. Where I apparently grew up too fast to cope with the terrible things that happened everywhere around me. Where there was no George to hug or Toby to protect me. Where there was only me and a life to push through.


	8. The Pond

Around noon, after leafing through a ton more letters and gifts, Toby drove us out to this little hiking area. I had on a least three new fan made friendship bracelets on my wrist, one the official colors of Tobuscus- black, red, and white. Fiddling with them on the way there, I was excited for the trip. I had been cooped up in the city for a while and I needed somewhere to run free.

The unpaved parking lot crunched under the weight of the car as we arrived. All we had was a water bottle that Toby held in his left hand. In his pocket he had his phone. I had the sneakers I had worn on the plane, grass stained from our trips to the park.

Dousing each other in bug spray, we were off. The path was wide at first so we walked side by side. Wild blackberries were slightly out of season, but the ones we found were incredibly ripe. Their purple juice stained our tongues and tasted delicious.

When the trail began to narrow, we were forced to go one by one. I walked in front of Toby, but I could hear his humming behind me. The tune was soft and delicate. It sounded familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it.

More and more large rocks began to get in our way. We climbed over them, but my feet were beginning to hurt so I rested on the rough surface. Toby handed me the water and sat on a boulder across from me.

"C'mere," he said when I finished capping the bottle. He turned his back towards me and squatted. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he held my legs. Pushing up, he stood and continued down the trail.

I road piggy-back the rest of the way, grasping onto the blue shirt with the stone logo painted on the front. Resting my head against his shoulder, the rhythm of his sturdy walk thumped along.

We reached the end of the path where a little beach waited for us. Cattails emerged from the pond water and swayed with the green reeds.

"Oh, wow," I exclaimed. The sun glimmered on the surface, making it look like the pond was sprinkled with diamonds.

"Let's go!" Toby kicked off his shoes, messily aiming them towards a little bench on the sand.

He ran awkwardly into the water, knees high so his shorts didn't get too wet. I thought he might fall, he seemed so off balance. But I laughed at his giddiness and ran after him. Toby had more energy than me.

The water was warm from the summer weather and the wet sand squished between my toes. Toby helped me hunt for freshwater clams that had dug themselves into the earth. One squirted him in the face when he fished it out of its home and he screamed in agony.

"AHHHH!" He cried, "IT ATTACKED ME WITH POISONOUS SPIT!" Toby squinted his face in disgust and sputtered out gibberish.

It couldn't have been anymore perfect.

In fact, it was so nice that I had to ask, "Why don't you vlog here?"

Toby plopped the clam back into the water and brought his hand to his pocket. He gazed out to the other side of the pond, where trees made the horizon shine green.

"I don't know, this is something for just the two of us. I don't have to share everything with… everyone. Maybe on the way back I will."

It was nice to think that we had this one moment together- away from the city and the camera, tiny waves lapping against my thighs. Already the bottom two inches of my shorts were soaked, but I didn't mind.

When we finally returned to shore, dry sand stuck to our wet feet, even crawling up our legs. I rubbed them together as I sat on the bench. Using my sock, I used the outside to brush the grime away. When they felt cleaner, I slipped back on my sneakers.

Toby was still standing barefoot on the beach. I walked over, sinking a bit into the sand with each step.

He sighed and I took his hand into mine.

"Aren't we leaving now?" I asked, tugging him out of his trance.

He nodded and thought aloud, "It's so peaceful here, Ant. I'm glad I got to share it with you."

"Mm-hm. Me too," I agreed.

"Sharing is caring," he chuckled at himself.

That night we had dinner at home. I helped Toby make pasta with homemade tomato sauce. Gryphon watched uninterested on the floor, only waiting for our attention.

"Can I give him a treat?" I bent down to the little dog as I asked, scratching him behind the ears.

"Yeah sure," Toby answered while stirring the pot of red sauce as it cooled.

I fished out a bone shaped biscuit from the plastic bag and held it above my head. Gryphon perked up and I laughed as he pranced around my feet. He calmed down a bit and sat as if that might persuade me to give in.

Licking his face in anticipation I brought the treat down and fed it to him.

He sped away with it in his mouth.

"Gryphon!" I cried, chasing after him. He always seemed to run off when you gave him a treat.

A tiny set of stairs boosted the dog up into a little door. The plastic flap shuttered closed behind him.

I slid the glass door open onto the back porch. The red painted wood was warm under my feet, heated by the sun. An unused hot tub sat quietly in the corner of the fenced backyard. Young trees were lit with strange blue Christmas lights in the far end, making the shape of VI.

Gryphon lay in the grass, tongue slobbering over the biscuit as he gnawed at it.

The sound of the door opening again grabbed my attention. I turned around to find Toby holding two plates of the pasta, one in each hand. A silver fork stuck out from each mound of the noodles, drowned in the tomato sauce.

"Let's eat out here."


	9. Careful

**Chapter 9**

Toby went to bed early. I didn't think he'd been sleeping well recently and I knew he really wanted to so I let him go without protest. It was the first night in California trying to fall asleep without the help of Toby's presence, but I made do with George in my arms. Plus, I was tired from the hike and I had worn away the soap smell from the bed.

The next morning Toby didn't wake me. I laid in the sheets for a long time until the digital clock read 10:20, but he never came like he always had. I finally gave in and got out of the warm bed. Not bothering to get dressed out of the over-sized tee shirt, I crept down the hall to Toby's room

I knocked carefully.

No answer.

"Toby?" I called through the wood. Was he that much of a deep sleeper?

I decided I better check what was going on and opened the door, glad to find it unlocked.

He was there, strewn across the mattress with only a thin blanket over him. I sighed in relief.

"Toby?" I called again, still in the doorway.

He continued sleeping. Or was he sleeping?

I panicked at the thought and ran to his bedside. Taking his arm, I shook him.

"Toby it's time to wake up!" I told him.

"Wha-?" His eyes fluttered open and he let out a groan.

"Oh, uh, sorry," but I was really just happy he was alive.

"No, it's fine." He brought his hand out from under the sheet and rubbed his forehead and temples.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Tired, headache," he winced and grasped his belly before continuing, "stomachache too."

I climbed up onto the bed and felt my hand against his cheek, something I remember the teacher doing back at school when a kid complained of not feeling well.

Hot, unnaturally hot.

"I think you're sick," I announced, "Wait a sec."

I hopped down and went into the kitchen. Propping myself up onto the counter, I retrieved a glass from the cabinet. I set it down beside me and jumped off. Taking the up back into my hand, I brought it to the sink and filled it with the tap water.

"Ant?" I heard Toby call.

"I'm coming!" I cried in return.

Balancing the glass in both my hands, I carefully made my way back to his room. He was sitting up now, his glasses set crookedly on the bridge of his nose.

I held out the water.

"Thanks, Ant," he said with a weak smile. I watched patiently as he took a few sips and rested it on the little side table. He made a little satisfied "ah" sound and then leaned back into the pillows.

"Are you going to be okay?" I whispered.

"I'll be fine. I'm going to call Olga, though. Because I feel like I'm dying, here."

I nodded. Even though I knew he was exaggerating when he said he felt like he was dying, I was worried.

"Could you bring me the phone please?" He gestured to the corner where the iPhone sat, plugged into the wall.

Ripping it free from the white cords, I returned to him and handed it over.

I laid out on the sheets and watched as he slid it open and quickly typed in the passcode. He texted Olga in a few short jabs of his thumbs and then dropped the phone onto the side table next to the water.

"You can go eat breakfast, Ant, I'm just going to try and rest," Toby murmured.

I nodded and let him be, closing the door behind me.

Scooping the stray flakes from my cereal bowl, I heard Gryphon skitter to where Olga came in. I dropped my spoon on the dining room table and ran to meet her.

Olga dropped her bag and leaned down to accept my hug, the key still clenched in her fist.

"How's Toby? Is he worrying you much?" She asked when I finally let go.

"Not really, but he's hot."

"Hm." She slipped off her shoes and took my hand, together we went to his side, where he was barely half asleep.

"Hey," he whispered.

"Don't you 'hey' me. C'mere and let me take your temperature." Olga ordered.

He chuckled, "So loving, aren't you?"

"You know I just want to help you."

"I know."

That morning Olga and I took turns watching him sleep. When it was her turn, I reluctantly left the foot of the bed where I liked to curl up and went into the back room, where Toby's three gaming monitors stood on a desk.

I would take the iPad from the drawer and settle in the white couch behind the desk, where I would watch YouTube videos to pass the time.

We only left the house once. She took us out to go grocery shopping for soup ingredients. She had made his the dish before, she told me, and it seemed to be the best medicine for when he had a fever.

She vlogged like normal as I sat in the shopping cart, gliding between the aisles of food.

He felt just good enough to eat at the table, so the three of us slurped down the steaming bowls of chicken noodle soup hungrily. I don't know how, but even though he felt terrible he still managed to pull out a laugh from me.


	10. Panic

I guess it was technically morning when Olga called the ambulance.

She had left our house earlier that night, satisfied that the medicine was keeping Toby's temperature down and decided to go home. She reminded me to brush my teeth as she exited through the door and I smiled and did as she said.

Toby was already fast asleep when I crawled into the sheets myself. Wrapping my arms around George, I closed my eyes.

From what I've gathered the blankets around him and the humid summer air heated Toby up when the aspirin finally wore off in the middle of the night. His fever shot up fast and his stomach gave in. I woke with a start when Toby half stumbled half ran to the bathroom and vomited into the toilet.

Sitting up, I heard his head crash into the side of the sink as he fell when he passed out onto the bathroom floor.

"TOBY?" I screamed, already flipping the sheets off me and leaping down from the bed.

"Oh no, oh no, oh no…" I muttered when I ran into the bathroom.

His temple was ripped open and blood oozed out of the side of Toby's head. All he had on were his boxers and a faded gray shirt that was slowly getting stained red. He lay awkwardly on the tiled floor, legs splayed uselessly and his neck stretched back so that his throat was left open and vulnerable.

I was shaking in terror, mind racing. My first thought was to grab a towel and press it against his head. So I lifted it carefully with both hands and gently placed the cloth underneath him. When I finished I sprinted to the living room, grabbing the phone and punched in Olga's number.

My hands were still shaking uncontrollably as I held it to my ear. As I heard the ringing on the other end, I realized that maybe I should be crying. At the thought I burst into tears.

"Toby?" I heard Olga's groggy voice from the tiny speaker, obviously just having woken up. When she heard my sobs her tone turned into worry, "Ant? Ant, what's wrong? What happened?"

It was then when I regretted crying, my voice was too wobbly and choked up to answer her, "T-Toby was- I don't- I don't think- he might be- d- dead- there was-s-s- blood- and- and-"

"Ant I'm going to be right there, okay?" I could hear her voice begin to quake, "I'm going to call for the hospital. Just stay with him and you'll be fine. Keep the phone on, I'm going to call with my cell."

I nodded and then realized she couldn't see that. "M-hm."

Keeping the phone to my ear, I hurried back to the bathroom, where Toby laid unconsciously. I heard Olga's fast breathing as I crouched beside him, shivering. She was talking but I couldn't hear what. My heart was pounding so loud it felt like it was pressing against my ears while my tears blurred my vision.

"Ant? Anita are you there?" She tried to get my attention.

"Wha- oh, yeah, I'm still here." I muttered, wiping my nose with my sleeve.

"The ambulance is on their way, I'm going to be there too in a sec, alright?"

"M-hm."

I didn't leave his side until I heard the sirens. I clumsily managed to unlock the door just as the paramedics ran up our steps.

"Where is he?" One of them asked me, three others right behind him.

I simply took his hand and led him to the bathroom. The four of them crowded around Toby so that I couldn't see a speck of him anymore.

They decided it was safe to move him to a more open space, so he was carried out into the lawn, where even more people waited. Lying on a strange blanket in the grass, he was well lit by the blinding flashlights some of them held over the busy crowd.

Even though it was possible for me to inspect his condition from this distance, I turned away, only to find Olga standing just two feet back.

I leaped into her open arms and we sat on the cool ground. Burying my face into her sweater, I shook even harder as new tears sprouted. She patted my head and didn't say anything, just gazed where Toby lay.

"Here, kid, you're gonna need it." It was the same man who asked me where Toby was. He held out a Tobuscus hoodie that had been strewn across the couch.

I pulled on the oversized sweater on top of my t-shirt/night gown. Hugging myself to wrap my body in its warmth, I looked up and tried to smile in thanks.

"Would you two like to ride in the ambulance with him?"

Olga helped me up and I nodded vehemently at the man.

"Yes… please," Olga replied.


	11. Nightmare

*** I have some little notes for you guys before we begin Chapter 11. If you don't care you can just skip this bit, it's not really that important. First of all, wow over 1,200 hits and 300 visitors. It's also amazing to see how many different countries I'm apparently writing for. I would've never thought I would get someone to read my work from Australia or the Netherlands or the United Kingdom or anywhere besides the US really (I still love all you Americans though, haha). Thanks so much for everyone who's stuck with me and Ant so far, we both love you guys a lot. And the other thing I wanted to tell you was that I've been very busy this week with finals from school. Unfortunately they came around the time where I actually got to some sort of climax in the story and I know that a lot of you wanted me to update a bit faster. I tried my best; I swear I really would've rather done this than study. Okay, I'm done keeping you in suspense. Thanks again! –Kymma (luckyendings)***

Toby was crying somewhere. I've never heard him sob like this with the wails of pain and cries for help. Through the strange darkness I followed the sound of his shaky breath. I started out slow and careful but picked up the pace as I felt my heart rate speed up when he sounded closer and closer.

"Toby?" I called out when I finally caught a glimpse of him in the black. But he didn't hear me.

"Toby? TOBY! Toby, can you hear me?" I screamed, right beside him now.

His head was still bleeding from the temple but his clothes were the same as when I first met him. No matter how hard I shouted at him, he couldn't hear. Toby just kept his head pressed into the floor and thumped his fist against the side of his leg like he needed the pain to distract him.

It was too much: Why couldn't he hear me? What wrong with him? Was it something I'd done? Why can't I help him?

I fell to my knees and covered my ear from his wails. Squeezing my eyes tight, I tried to prevent myself from crying along with him. But Toby's yelling leaked through my fingers until…

It stopped.

"Toby?" I whispered, untangling myself.

I crawled over to where he lay, completely still now with his hands relaxed and his head face down.

"What's wrong? Toby, listen to me!" I grasped his shoulders and rolled him over to see that his face was calm but completely motionless.

"Nononononononono… Toby…" I choked out, "Toby, wake up. No, not now. Please, not now. I need you!"

"Ant. Ant, wake up. Shhh… it was just a dream," Olga crooned.

I had been crying in my sleep, soaking Olga's pajama pants with my tears. We were in the waiting room, and I had fallen asleep with my head in her lap as we did what one does in a waiting room.

"Sorry," I muttered, sitting up again. She reached over with a tissue and wiped my face. Her eyes were red, she had been crying too.

"It's okay, Ant. Do you want to talk about it? That way it won't come true."

I told her the story carefully, making sure I didn't mess anything up.

"Aw, Nita, that's not going to happen. I promise Toby's not going to die. The bleeding came from a cut that wasn't very deep; he just had a really high fever. He'll be fine and out of here soon."

"Have you seen him yet?"

"No, not yet. I was going to wait for you to wake up."

"So we can go now?"

Olga nodded and I got up fast. She gathered her coat and purse from around her and led me down the halls. I realized I was still only wearing the oversized tee and the sweatshirt, so I felt very vulnerable going down the sterile white corridors.

We reached a room where a doctor came out. Olga conversed with him and he let us inside.

"Stay as long as you want," the doctor said before closing the door behind us.

Toby lay in the hospital bed, sleeping. I rushed over to him and tentatively touched his hand that hung out of the sheets. His head had a piece of gauze taped to his temple without a sign of red seeping through. I bit my lip and held on to his hand, not wanting to slip into another nightmare.

We stayed in the room with him for what seemed like forever until I had the idea. Toby was probably going to be unwell for the whole day. But he had a promise to keep with his audience.

"Olga, can I use your phone for something?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah, sure. Anything you want," she mumbled. Reaching into her purse she pulled out an iPhone. It looked very different than Toby's with that bunny-ears cover.

She clicked it open for me and passed it over. I had seen Toby do it a million times. Like him, I opened up the camera app and stood up. I gazed around the room for a good place to start and then decided I better just get right to the point.

"Audience? What are you doing looking at Toby sleeping in the hospital? He's not feeling very good today." I could see Olga smiling at me from the little screen so I walked over to her, "Hey can you do the intro?"

"Sure, Intro of DARKNESS then RE- oh there it is- REDNESS then WHITENESS." She grinned after taking her finger off the lens. "There you go, Ant."

"Thank you," I went to Toby's side, holding out the camera so it could see my face, "We have to be very quiet, but he hit his head on the side of the sink. I had to call Olga and it was scary, but I'm happy that I know he's going to be okay. Olga says he's going to be home tomorrow. Maybe he'll be able to make his own video for you guys by then. I hope so, 'cause I don't like hospitals that much."

I sighed and dropped the arm holding the camera down onto the bed while lowering my head down as well. I rested my chin on my free arm and filmed myself staring at Toby for a good thirty seconds. Letting my eyes droop, I felt Olga's hands rub my shoulders.

I looked up at her and reached out to hug her. The lens was pressed up against her back but neither of us cared.

"I don't have anything else, so let's just stop it now," I muttered when we finally let go, "Um, bless your face. Peace off. Leave a comment wishing Toby to be better. Boop!"

Olga didn't mention my lack of a proper outro but instead kissed me on the forehead.

"Do you want me to upload this to Toby's channel for you?" She asked me.

"Yes, please."

I watched as she punched in a title, talking out loud as she typed, "Ant's… first… vlog… and… uploading!"

For over five minutes I just stared at the little bar slowly fill up until it was done. Then I kept hitting refresh, reading all the comments that streamed in even after only seconds of it being uploaded.

_get well soon toby!_

[… scroll scroll…]

_ aw ant you're so cute! hope toby gets better!_

[… scroll scroll…]

_ so this is why there wasn't any tobygames today. get well soon tobuscus…_

[…scroll scroll…]

_ NO TOBY'S IN THE HOSPITAL OMG IM SO SORRY ANT I LOVE YOU_

[… scroll scroll…]

_ best of luck to both of you!_

[… scroll scroll …]


	12. Home

The next day Olga brought us back to pick up Toby. She had a purple Tobuscus tee, pair of shorts and sandals for his coming-home clothes. It was my first time seeing him conscious again and when I finally did I ran.

He was already halfway down the hall, Olga by his side with the empty bag hung around the crook of her elbow. A row of black stitches etched along where the gaping cut used to be. Olga had gone in to give him the clothes while she left me with a nurse to get a Jell-O from the cafeteria.

I've always liked Jell-O. I would squish it between the roof of my mouth and tongue, letting the sweetness burst. But all that was forgotten as I sprinted towards Toby.

He opened up and I leaped into his waiting embrace. He lifted me off the ground from under my arms and swung me around. I was perched on his forearm as he leaned back to look at me.

"Thank you so much, Ant. I might not even be here if it weren't for you, you little smartling."

I smiled wide and wrapped my arms around his neck. Burying my face into his shoulder, I took a shaky breath but didn't cry. I was too relieved and tired to cry.

"I love you," he whispered into my ear.

"I love you too," I muttered back, muffled by his shirt.

Closing my eyes, I could feel him begin to walk. Olga's footsteps were beside us as we made our way to the front door. The heat succumbed us when we walked out, leaving the cool air conditioned hospital.

He clicked open the back door to Olga's car and plopped me inside.

"Hey," he said, "I saw that vlog you made, you were really good. Thanks for that too."

"Oh, you're welcome." I replied, a bit surprised.

"A lot of people liked it. Later, maybe you could do some more."

"Later," I lingered on the word and it tasted like a promise.

He smiled and buckled me in, then shut the door and climbed into the passenger seat. Olga patted his arm from her side before starting the car and leaving the lot.

I sunk into the seat and gazed out the window, watching the world rush by. My promise was still dawdling around in my mind. When I first made that video I didn't think it had meant much, I was just letting his audience know what was happening in our lives. But now I was going to make more videos, talk to them even more, interact with them more.

Still staring out, I tried to imagine what it's like from their perspective. If I really liked to watch Toby's work and he suddenly stopped, I would worry. If all I got to see was a short little clip of his life of him in the hospital, I would worry. I realized that even though I updated them, they would never see the whole picture. They only get a few minutes at most.

But would they even care that much. Of course, Toby might not be as important to them as he is to me.

Then I remembered Kristy.

No, there are definitely people who care about him just as much as me. It would be great if I could share that with them.

So I sighed and relaxed my shoulders that I didn't even know I was tensing up. Toby was home now. That was what mattered.

Olga dropped us off at the front door and as soon as we got inside Gryphon was there to greet us. Our family reunion was full of my soft giggle and Toby's loud laugh.

He left me after a bit to turn on a laptop and check over a few things.

"Alright, you nuggets, I need a shower," Toby said as he passed by to muss up my hair, leaving the computer open on the coffee table.

"Mkay, come out soon, though," I replied, still petting Gryphon.

"You know it!" I heard him yell from the hall.

"Hey, Gryphon, wanna treat?" I crooned, jumping up.

The dog's little head perked up and he flipped himself over onto his feet. He chased me to the kitchen, and I fished out a treat from the plastic bag.

"Here you go," I told him, handing it over to his panting mouth, "This is for you being a good boy at Olga's while Toby was away."

As soon as the biscuit was in his teeth, he bolted away.

"You're welcome!" I hollered at him, but he was already out the dog flap.

I got off the kitchen floor and wandered over to Toby's open laptop and read the screen. He had been reading messages on Twitter.

Smiling, I silently hoped he wouldn't get mad at me for doing this.

I slowly typed into the little box labeled "Compose new Tweet…"

"hello. toby left his twitter open. this is ant."

What? I needed someone to talk to.

After hitting "Tweet" I sat back on the couch and stared at the screen for some sort of response.

Almost immediately I got a reply.

"(a)TobyTurner why hello there ant. how are you and toby?"

It was from someone called MissMaddyBella.

"(a)MissMaddyBella I'm fine. toby's just come home and is in the shower now."

"(a) TobyTurner what a relief we would've died if anything worse had happened to him."

"(a)MissMaddyBella oh, well he's going to be okay now. thank you for the talk."

"(a)TobyTurner no problem ant. have a nice night!"

There were about another thirty tweets waiting for me to answer. So I spent my time waiting on the computer, answering the questions and reassuring fans.

They really do care.


	13. Piano

When I heard the shower turn off I quickly typed a good bye message.

"toby's coming out now! thanks for everything! bye!"

I hit "Tweet" and then quickly jumped off the couch. Running to my room, I almost bumped into Toby as he came out of the bathroom with a towel knotted around his waist.

"Ant?" he asked, bewildered, as I whizzed by.

"NOOOOTHING!" I cried out, leaping into my bed and grabbing George for protection.

"WHAT DID YOU DO?" he hollered, lumbering in while holding up the towel.

I giggled and stuffed my face into George's fur.

He gave me an I'm-watching-you look and then strutted out.

In the end he either never found out or never bothered to give me a telling about hacking his twitter. I would guess that he just didn't want to say anything, though.

"Hey, Toby?" I asked later that day, gripping on to the side of the door outside of his office.

He turned away from the computer screen and spun in the black desk chair, "Yeah, Ant?"

"What's VidCon?" Someone had tweeted me about it whether or not I was going earlier and I hadn't known how to answer.

"I was meaning to tell you. It's a YouTube gathering happening soon, actually. We're going to drive to Anaheim and stay there in a hotel for the weekend. You'll be coming with me, of course, you'll get to meet tons of audience-es."

"And you're tell me this now?" I smiled.

"Well I'm not very organized and I forget things. Come on, Ant, gimme a break."

"I'm just kidding," I walk into the office and sit on a stool beside the keyboard.

He smiled at me and then returned to his editing. Meanwhile I clicked on the piano and stared at the thousands of sound effect choices.

I punched in a random code and got "Angelic Choir." Never having learned how to play piano, I simply pressed down the white keys from left to right. The piano made fake heavenly voices and I had the urge to try every option possible on the keyboard.

That would take days. But I tried anyway.

I was ten effects in when Toby sighed and spun in the desk chair to face me again, his computer frozen at a random video frame that showed himself laughing with his head thrown back in front of the official Cute-Win-Fail white background. Hearing him, I immediately stopped and smiled innocently. I should've known that what I was doing would be distracting.

"Sorry," I muttered.

"Naw, it's fine. You're just doing it wrong." He got up and stood over me on the stool. In an instant he broke into Dramatic Song. I hummed along, doing the singing part but not really singing.

"Here you can do it too, it's not that hard and you're smart." Toby played the first right hand bit slowly. When he finished it he placed my own right hand onto the keys but an octave higher than his fingers were so we could play together.

Trying my best I attempted to repeat what I had seen him do. I messed up after only three notes but Toby jumped in on his octave and led me through the rest.

An hour later I had the whole right hand part down. We could play together with him on the left hand and me on the right.

After a successful rendition of the entire song Toby smiled his huge sincere smile down at me.

"I told you you were smart. Maybe if you practice enough you can play with me at VidCon. Would you want to?"

I looked away from his hopeful face and stared at the keyboard. Play with him? On stage? In front of thousands of people that only now me as his goddaughter? I didn't know.

For one it didn't seem real for Toby to be playing on a stage. Toby was Toby and Toby was the man who cared for me in our little home and made me laugh. He slept on his stomach, liked Thai food, and still screamed when he played video games even if he wasn't recording. Toby. That was it. It was difficult to try to imagine him in a spotlight, waving to cheering fans. And when I try to put myself beside him the image just crumbles.

"I don't know, I'll have to think about it," I finally tell him.

"Well Ant if it's stage fright you know I'll be with you the whole time. If you're too nervous to play onstage I can do it on my own."

"I'll at least go on with you, I guess. Playing- I'm still not sure."

"Thanks, Ant. We'll have fun, I promise."


	14. VidCon Day 1

**Chapter 14**

VidCon was loud, noisy, crowded and utterly amazing. The convention was full of a bustle of the most fun-loving people. Some dressed up from tuxedos to banana suits while others held signs saying "Free Hugs." The whole floor was full of lines to different stations of YouTubers while a giant stage waited a room away for the majorly talented and brave.

Toby stayed in our hotel room to upload gaming videos for that first morning of VidCon. Meanwhile I walked around with Olga. Every so often a fan, or moosher, would approach her and ask for an autograph or even a picture. At one point she was so massively swarmed that I just grasped her skirt and gaped, overwhelmed.

It was just amazing to see how connected these people were, despite never having met before. A few even recognized me and said hello.

"Hey, Ant! Could you sign this for me please?" I heard a voice say as I felt someone tap my shoulder.

"What?" I said, whirling around to find a group of three girls smiling excitedly down at me. The blonde one in the middle was holding out a silver Sharpie while the girl to her left held out a VidCon bag.

"Could you sign it?" the blonde girl repeated. "My name's Hannah and this is Lonny and Isabel."

"Oh, hi," I answered politely.

"So can you sign our bag please?" asked Lonny.

"Um, yeah, sure, I guess," I took the Sharpie and uncapped it. In careful cursive I wrote "_Ant_" on the bag.

"Thanks a lot!" said Hannah, gleefully.

"Yeah, thanks!" Isabel chimed in. "Was that your first autograph?"

"Mm-hm." I nodded.

"Aw, oh my gosh we're so lucky!" Lonny squealed, "Ant, you are so awesome. I loved how you made that Lazy when Toby was in the hospital! You were so amazing and cute! I bet Toby was so happy when he found that!"

I laughed a bit and smiled, "Yeah he liked it."

"Speaking of Toby," Hannah started, "Do you know where he is? We haven't found him yet and we've been dieing to meet him."

"He's still at the hotel room. He has to upload the gaming videos."

The three pairs of shoulders slumped slightly.

"Oh, do you know when he'll be out?" Isabel asked.

"He'll definitely be out when he has to do his Annoying Orange panel. Then after that I think him and I are gonna walk around some more."

"Alright, thanks, Ant! Maybe we'll get to see you again!" Hannah waved and began to leave.

"Bye!" Lonny and Isabel said together, then hurried away to follow their friend.

I watched them walk away in a daze. I hadn't even realized the mob around Olga had already dispersed, but her hand on my back spun me around to see.

"Oh, they're all gone?" I ask, although it was quite obvious they were.

She laughed, "Yup, they're gone looking for more YouTubers. Did those girls recognize you?"

"Yeah. They even asked me to sign their bag."

"That's nice! Was it fun getting to do your first autograph?" Olga said, smiling.

"Well, it was a bit weird."

Before noon a buzz came from Olga's purse. She pulled out her phone and read the screen.

"Toby says we can meet him at this food court for lunch. Then you're gonna go with him to his Annoying Orange panel." She informed me, not letting her eyes look up from the iPhone.

"What will you be doing?" I asked.

"I'm actually gonna do a live show for all the mooshers who couldn't go to VidCon," she answered, finally clicking the phone off and returning it to its place in her purse.

Toby was already in line at one of the many restaurants that bordered the food court. He greeted me with a quick squeeze of the shoulders.

"So, how'd it go?" He asked, wittingly.

"I was recognized sometimes. Olga was recognized all the time."

He laughed at my response. "Olga tells me you got your name on a bunch of people's stuff."

"Not a bunch, only, like, five!" I retort, knowing he was talking about my autographs.

"That's awesome, though! You're gonna have to sign something for me someday."

I rolled my eyes.

"Alright, I'm joking. What do you want for lunch, Ant?"

I hadn't realized all that walking had made me so hungry. I devoured my chicken fingers and fries, finishing it up with a gulp of chocolate milk.

Toby ate the last bite of his sandwich just as a little boy who looked only a bit younger than me began to run to our table. The boy's mop of dark hair bounced as he dodged the staggered chairs, racing away from his family. Toby couldn't see him because he was coming from behind him. However I perked up quickly at the sight of the sprinting figure.

"Uh, Toby," and pointing behind him, "He looks like he's gonna run into you."

"Wha-?" Toby turned just as the boy slammed into the back of his chair.

"AREYOUTOBUSCUS?!" The boy nearly screamed.

"YES!" Toby replied with equal enthusiasm.

"OHMYGOD- MOM!" The boy spun and jumped up and down. "IT'S REALLY HIM! I TOLD YOU!"

"Goodness, Jake, I never doubted you," his mother said, rubbing her ear.

Toby laughed and held out his hand to the parents, "Hi, I'm Toby."

"Yeah, we know," the father said.

The mother tsk-ed at her husband while giving him a disapproving look. Taking Toby's hand she introduced herself, "I'm Margaret, this is my husband John. You've already met Jake."

Jake was still jumping up and down, supporting himself with the back of Toby's chair. "My brother's an Audience too!" he cried gleefully, pulling out a tall young man with the same dark hair from behind his parents.

"Oh, uh, hi." He muttered, pushing up his glasses nervously.

"His name is Dustin and he can play guitar! He can play your theme song! He even made a video! He tried to get you to see it but-"

"Jake! Shut up!" Dustin muttered beneath his breath.

"What? It's true." Jake stopped jumping and turned his attention back to Toby. "I've watched all your videos on Tobuscus but not on TobyGames 'cause Amnesia is scary but I really like your Minecraft 'cause I play Minecraft too!

"Wow!" Toby said, smiling ridiculously and laughing every few seconds. "You sure have a lot to say."

I was amazed. Both at this boy named Jake and how Toby handled him. I watched Dustin for a bit. He seemed heavily embarrassed about his blathering brother and I couldn't help feeling a bit sorry for him. Jake must be ruining his moment with Toby.

Dustin noticed me staring and waved with a tiny movement of his fingers.

I waved back.

"Here, you guys sit down," Toby said, pulling over chairs from empty tables, "This might take a while with this guy."

Toby reached into his back pocket and pulled out his iPhone, like I've seen him do countless times before. As he slides it open Dustin sits next to me while the rest of the family sits too. The only person that continued to stand was Jake, still gripping the back of Toby's chair.

Dustin crossed his legs and nervously pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"Audience? Wha-? What are you doing staring at the most hyper little Audience child I've ever seen?"

"Hi!" Jake shouted, waving at the little camera.

Toby continued the vlog, talking about VidCon and what he planned to do at the show. Jake stayed behind him the whole time, never missing a chance to make a silly face or dance around when the camera took the slightest glimpse at him.

Dustin only gestured once towards the Audience when Toby quickly introduced the rest of Jake's family. After that Dustin simply watched my godfather talk to his phone.

"So, how are you, Ant?" He asked me suddenly, turning to look at me with a little smile.

"Oh, I'm good," I replied, grinning back up at him.

"Have you enjoyed VidCon?"

I nodded in response. "You?"

"The best time I've ever had, honestly," he crossed his legs and seemed to relax a bit, "It took quite a lot of convincing my parents to take us here, but Jake has a way with people."

"Hm."

"They still don't quite understand why I wanted to come," he whispered, leaning down to my ear, "I've tried to tell them I want to be a YouTuber, and that all my heroes are here, but they still don't understand."

I pulled away to look at him, "I understand. Being a YouTuber is the best job ever!"

"Tell me about it," he said with another small smile.

At the moment I couldn't put my finger on it. But now I know that I had this oddly strong admiration for Dustin. It's natural for a younger person to admire and look up to an older one but for some reason Dustin stood out.

****You know what? I'm a person. And as a person this is usually the area in a story where I give up, leave it alone, never end up finishing it. And as a person I had plenty of things to distract me from this. So, yeah. That's why this took me so long. (I mean this is also the longest chapter I've made so please forgive me). What made me change my mind about giving up? Well it was that despite the fact I wasn't updating you guys were still faving and subbing. You guys also kept checking for the finished version of Chapter 13. Yeah, I can tell. I mean, that chapter alone had nearly triple the amount of views as the other chapters. It means a lot. I hope I can keep writing. I do have ideas for the future of Ant (start of school and such) I just need to really push through this tough spot. If I do, this'll be the first story this long I've ever finished. So, yeah. Thanks. Oh yeah, this will probably also be a good time to tell you about Ant's blog. I opened up a tumblr for her so you guys can ask questions. Whether it's about her backstory or the plot or whatever. The URL is askantbuscus. Originally I posted chapters their but I couldn't maintain posting two places so I'm just making it an ask blog. Yeah okay bye. Thanks again. ~Kymma****


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